So, another “investor” has landed, but instead of a taxi to a five-star hotel, he got a one-way trip to the backrooms of a police station. Ige Nasa, a 37-year-old holding both Somali and Australian passports, thought he could waltz through JKIA’s Terminal 1A like he owns the place. He arrived from Johannesburg on a Kenya Airways flight, probably expecting the usual Nairobi breeze and a quick exit to the “soft life,” but the only thing waiting for him was an immigration alert that has been active since January.

Let’s be real, the “dual citizen” tag is often just a fancy cover for people who think they can play both sides of the law. You make your mess in Australia, fly over here to hide or “invest,” and hope the Kenyan system is too lazy to notice. But for once, the immigration control desk actually had their eyes open. It turns out Nasa was flagged for “obtaining money by false pretences” - the polite, legal term for being a common con artist who thinks everyone else is a fool.

He was processed at the JKIA Police Station and handed over to the Directorate of Criminal Investigations (DCI). We know the drill. The DCI will post some dramatic prose on social media, the public will cheer for “justice,” and then the slow, grinding, and often corrupt wheels of Kenyan “justice” will start turning. In a city where everyone is looking for a shortcut to wealth, Nasa is just another face in a crowded gallery of people who think honesty is a lifestyle they can’t afford.

It’s almost dark comedy how we focus on these individual scammers while the entire country is sinking under a much bigger, state-sanctioned fraud. While the police are busy catching one guy at the airport, the rest of us are suffocating under The IMF Debt Trap Killing Kenyan Dreams. Our economy is so broken and our leaders are so compromised that “obtaining money by false pretences” has practically become a survival strategy for the elite and the wannabes alike.

Don’t hold your breath for a conviction or the return of any stolen funds. In Nairobi, if you have enough Australian dollars or the right connections, the “false pretences” usually find a way to evaporate into thin air. By next week, don’t be surprised if this guy is seen sipping expensive whiskey in a Kilimani lounge while the case file mysteriously catches a cold. Welcome to the 254, where the only real crime is being poor enough to stay in jail.