Welcome to the latest episode of the Kenyan political circus, where the stage is a parched Northern Kenya and the performers are well-fed men in bespoke suits. If you thought the government’s inability to manage anything was limited to sports - like the CHAN 2024 Ticketing Scam that left fans stranded - wait until you see how they handle a national disaster. President Ruto is currently on a three-day “development tour” in Garissa. But let’s be honest: you can’t see the ribs of a starving cow from 10,000 feet. David Maraga, who seems to be the only one actually using a road instead of the sky, called it out for exactly what it is - a manufactured PR stunt. Ruto flies in, talks to a “manufactured” crowd that has been coached on when to clap, hands over some “NYOTA” funds that won’t last a week, and flies back to Nairobi. It’s not leadership; it’s aerial tourism. Then we have Rigathi Gachagua, the former DP who has suddenly discovered his conscience now that he’s out in the cold. He’s doing the math, and for once, the math is depressing. He claims the government is spending Sh1,200 per person. In Nairobi, that barely buys you a decent platter of fries and a soda at a mall. In the North, it’s supposed to be a lifeline. It’s an insult. He’s calling for a “National Disaster” declaration, but let’s not pretend he wasn’t part of the same machinery that ignored this crisis for months. The response from the top? Calling critics “idlers” and “fools.” Ruto’s arrogance is peaking. Instead of addressing why Sh10 billion hasn’t reached the mouths of 3.3 million starving Kenyans, he’s busy mocking Gachagua’s “capacity to plan.” Meanwhile, CS Aden Duale wants to take the hunger crisis to a TV talk show. He’s challenging Gachagua to a debate on Jeff Koinange Live. Because nothing says “we care about dying children” like a shouting match on a mahogany bench under studio lights. The reality on the ground is simple: the money is being “disbursed” into the pockets of the well-connected, the helicopters are burning fuel that could buy tons of grain, and the people of Northern Kenya are being used as backdrops for the 2027 campaign trail. They call each other fools, but the real fools are those of us expecting a different result from the same old players. The North is dying, and Nairobi is just checking the weather for the next flight out.